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Women Leaders In Technology (WLIT) Coffee Talk: Use Your Mind to Create Purpose in Your Life

Kelly Sutter

November 2, 2022

Rocket Software recently held its quarterly Women Leaders in Technology (WLIT) Coffee Talk. Participants have lauded the WLIT Coffee Talks as “insightful tips and perspectives from inspirational leaders” and say that the conversations “are always so empowering and inspiring.” The WLIT group is made up of a remarkable group of Rocket ambassadors who work to create an environment of mentorship and connection that supports and provides guidance for women working in a typically male-dominated industry.

During this session, Rocket’s Head of Global Field Marketing, Kelly Sutter, sat down with Kimber Chin, author and Certified Mind Power Coach, who has over 30 years of corporate leadership experience in the tech industry. After being diagnosed and surviving late-stage breast cancer in her early 30s, Kimber began looking at life through a new lens and using her job and experiences to uncover and pursue her truest passions. Throughout our discussion, Kimber explained what motivated her to write her conversational and advice-laden self-help book Sensible Keto __ and the steps she took to take control of her thoughts and start living a more fulfilling life. The guests were inspired by the real-life examples shared in this talk. Here are the three biggest takeaways from Kimber’s insightful look into the human psyche and how we can shift our perspectives and use our minds to improve our personal and professional outcomes with ourselves and others and ultimately shape a life we love.

Change your inner dialogue

Every human has a voice inside their head that talks to them throughout the day. That voice is the many thoughts in their mind, and it has the power to dictate the way an individual views certain situations. Our thoughts can be useful and keep us safe, like being able to recognize a saber tooth tiger and know it’s time to run. Our thoughts are very good at this, so any sort of change feels like danger, and internal dialogue can put a negative connotation around everyday events. Thoughts lead to beliefs, which is why some of us believe we have a lack of choice or are worse off than we actually are.

Kimber used the example of going to the dentist. When a person thinks about a trip to the dentist, they often tell themselves, “I have to go to the dentist.” But they don’t have to go to the dentist. Their inner dialogue frames the situation as if they don’t have a choice—and their subconscious feeds into that thinking. In reality, that person doesn’t have to go to the dentist; they actively are choosing to go __ to the dentist. Kimber argues that by consciously changing your inner dialogue, you can look at daily tasks and activities from a place of power and begin to look forward to new opportunities and challenges throughout the day. The language we use shapes our stance in the world.

Get clear on what matters to you

Kimber discussed how, at face value, everyone has a list of things they like or want. For example, someone may like to work out and want to keep their home clean—but is that really at the top of their values? For some, the desire to keep a clean house may be a projection; it is simply a side effect of upbringing. Their parents liked to keep a clean house, so now they have an inherent urge to tidy up. A clean home may be number 30 on their list of values, so tidying is out of alignment with their values. That gap causes inner turmoil. And for others, being healthy could be number one on their values list, and if they choose not to work out, that also is a gap that causes grief. Often, people don’t stop to evaluate if their daily actions and stated likes and dislikes align with their values. That is why Kimber presents her clients with a 100 wants challenge—a call to action to identify 100 things they want, whether it be in their personal or professional life. Most people can’t let themselves want 100 things. Once they complete 100, she has them prioritize the top 10 so that each day, the client can evaluate if their daily actions and decisions are creating any gaps.

Once the 100 wants are identified, she also has them list 100 Values, which are one-word phrases like “health, wealth, family, peace.” She then assigns a journaling project to unlock the dreaming mind. The prompt is simple: write about your dream life as if it has already happened, without regard to whether it could happen. Talk about how awesome it feels and describe everything with as much detail as possible.

Over time, this exercise empowers clients to recognize patterns in their desires so they can uncover what truly matters to them. Once someone knows what really matters to them, they can align their true passions with their daily actions and decisions to reduce gaps between what is valued and what is done.

Make the small changes to live the life you love

Use the things that matter most to you as a blueprint, or roadmap, to live the life you want. Kimber believes it is about focusing on the incremental, sometimes difficult, daily changes to your life that align with the things you value most. Say you value your health but have a late-night sweet tooth. Rather than continue eating sweets at night or telling yourself that your diet starts tomorrow, next week, or next month, take the small, necessary steps to reduce your craving for sweets—drink that glass of water after dinner, remove high-sugar snacks from your cabinet and so on.

This can also be true with your career path. If you value mentoring others, like Kimber, but your trajectory does not align with your professional aspirations, take the small steps within your role or behind the scenes to bring yourself closer to the things you value. Take advantage of workplace training or sign up for a college course that aligns with your professional goals. By focusing on the small steps, each day, before long, you will be living a life you love.

In order to achieve these goals, Kimber believes you must start by investing in yourself and that all it takes to begin is just five minutes each morning. If you can invest five minutes of the morning on yourself to journal, meditate, list all the things you are grateful for or just think about the day ahead, you will put yourself in the right mindset to meet the challenges of that day and begin to embrace the opportunities of tomorrow.

Kimber is launching new ways to guide working women to live their best life in the form of an upcoming book, new group coaching zooms coming in November, and a series of free online classes. To be the first to know about them, visit kimberchincoaching.com, and be sure to subscribe or follow her on social media. Listen to Kelly and Kimber’s full discussion on-demand by clicking here.

Register now for the next WLIT Coffee Talk on International Women’s Day on March 8th, 2023, at 11:00 am ET, where Rocket will be joined by its partner ReacHIRE, to discuss how they support women in building their leadership skills, relationships and community which in turn helps organizations build healthy and diverse work environments.

For more on Rocket’s Women Leaders in Technology, visit the WLIT page.